Access Denied
flash fiction | won't work
Under the hum of fluorescent lights, Mark gave up. “I don’t see any way this can work.”
“That’s what I told you fifteen minutes ago.” Thomas was still muttering while jabbing unresponsive buttons. A sleek, hulking machine loomed between them, blinking error messages ominously.
Through the glass wall, Mark observed a coworker approaching the copy room. “Let’s ask Giselle.”
“What would she know? She probably hasn’t seen this beast yet.”
She strode in, heels clicking, waved a card over the reader and commanded the sleeping hulk to attention. “You boys just couldn’t wait?”
The guys were flummoxed.
“They’ll have cards for everyone -- supposedly by lunch. I got one early because I happened to be here on Saturday when they completed the installation.” Giselle slid a stack of reports into the paper tray. “Apparently, someone has been making copies of non-work items.” She glanced furtively at them while entering digits like she’d already done this a hundred times.
Mark and Thomas exchanged a weary glance.
“Didn’t you see the memo last week?”
The latest memo: four pages of inhuman gibberish. They’d both filed it immediately under ‘Read Later (Never)’.
“We...” Thomas started, then trailed off. “We were just trying to get these quarterly reports duplicated before the deadline.”
Giselle sighed, the faint click of the copier spooling up filling the air. “Well, you’re in luck. I need fifty copies of this spreadsheet. I’ll do yours while I’m at it. What’s your code?”
“Code?” Mark’s eyebrows nearly vanished into his hairline.
Giselle pointed to a new instruction sign taped to the wall. “Your departmental copy code. For billing.” She initiated the final sequence that launched the beast into overdrive. “Honestly, if it weren’t for the coffee maker being so close to this thing, I don’t think anyone would ever figure out how to operate it.”
Behind the creature’s low growl and quick, paper-spitting fury, Thomas whispered, “Self-aware yet?”
Mark replied, “Maybe. But memo-readers only? It’s gonna develop an attitude fast. And Giselle’s the only one it’ll respect.”
by George Alger
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